Every child has some stress in their life, whether it's about making friends or learning a new skill. Unfortunately, sometimes children grow up with an excessive amount of stress that could hinder their lifelong development, especially if they don't have a supportive and nurturing caregiver to help them through it. According to research studies, "children exposed to traumatic or stressful events have an increased probability of developing major depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, and attention-deficit/hyperactivity" (Berger, 2012).
When I was about ten, my family lost everything we owned, bought a motorhome and drove across the country to "start over." My parents, five brothers, three sisters, and myself packed one backpack of belongings each and said goodbye to everything familiar, not really knowing what would happen next. We ended up driving to Alaska all the way from Florida. My parents sold everything they could before we moved in order to have a little cash to get started with. Fortunately, people were kind and my dad was motivated to find work. I knew we didn't have much and things were very stressful for many years. Other people helped, neighbors and community members mainly. I didn't ask for things or complain about things, my parents were stressed enough and needed help with my younger siblings. At the age of ten, I was pretty flexible with the changes and with my family all going through the same things, I didn't feel alone.
According to the article, Poverty, Family Stress and Parenting, written by Zahid Shahab Ahmed "economic deprivation leads to depression and stress in parents and ultimately dysfunction of the family" (Shahab, 2005). In my situation, the burden of the stress fell on my parents. My father became depressed and felt like a failure. My parents started fighting a lot and things got stressful due to their struggling relationship. When I was sixteen they divorced which opened a whole bunch of other stressors and that time a lot of the burden fell on me as the oldest child living at home. According to the Family Stress Model, long-term poverty creates family stressors and leads to lasting effects on the child's health and development. Although my family never went hungry or lived on the streets, the poverty affected us in other ways.
While researching poverty in other countries, I found that children in other countries may experience very serious side-effects of poverty such as:
-malnutrition
-little or no education
-child labor
-no access to safe water
-and lack of medical care.
"In Sierra Leone, 840 women in every 100,000 die in childbirth."
"In Italy, 4 in every 100,000 die in childbirth."
"Only 17% of the women in Sierra Leone use contraceptives compared to 88% in Norway."
(www.poverties.org)
The lack of education and medical care make it almost impossible to break free of the poverty. The children are stuck in a cycle of living day to day and going without necessities.
References:
Ahmed, Z.S. (2005) Poverty, Family Stress & Parenting. Retrieved from:
http://www.humiliationstudies.org/documents/AhmedPovertyFamilyStressParenting.pdf
Berger, K.S. (2012). The developing person through childhood (6th Ed.). New York, NY: Worth Publishers
Poverties.org Research for social & economic development. (2013) Causes & effects of poverty on society, children & violence. Retrieved from: http://www.poverties.org/effects-of-poverty.html
Wow, Mary. What a story. I think when stressful things are happening to us as children that it is easier if you are a part of a group that you know loves and cares about you. Certainly this experience made you stronger and may have been the value you found in the group that helped you cultivate your own self-concept and seek a career in early childhood. It makes me think of the movie "Life is Beautiful" where a man tries to help his children escape the tragedies of war and poverty by pretending they were playing a game. The parental attitude toward poverty has so much to do with how well the children adjust. Many well-adjusted and functioning adults do come from hard circumstances which they overcome; it sounds like you are part of this category. However, many do not, and need special attention from caregivers outside the family. I feel that more families than we realize are going through some stage of poverty(living paycheck to paycheck), but it's their attitude about it that often makes the difference for children. Through your own experiences, I'm sure you are able to provide some tertiary prevention for children in your classrooms now coping with similar experiences of your own. Your understanding and sympathy, ability to find resources, and education make you just the type of angel they need in their lives to help them overcome the adverse effects of poverty. Blessings.
ReplyDeleteMary,
ReplyDeleteYour story is expiring to us all. Starting over is not easy and Im sure it had to be devastated for you and your siblings being they were so young. I am a true believer that everything happens fora reason. Starting over made you, Im sure value the little things in life nd it also showed you how hard life is. We as parents often try to shield our children from stressors of knowing how hard things are in life. For me I am just the opposite, I feel that if children see and know how hard you have to struggle and sacrifice, they will appreciate life more and value what they have. I know your parents was appreciated of the community, neighbors, and friends that supported you and your family while you all was trying to get on your feet. With that kind of support it enable you and your family make it work for the family. Even though your parents separated, I feel you understood and it made you a better person as you sound like you are today.
As the issue of poverty in other countries, I feel that most people feel that poverty means living on the street but yes it does affect children in other areas in life. I feel living in the U. S. we have been very lucky as poverty is not so widespread as other countries. Thanks for sharing your story.