A Self-Evaluation of Communication

This week I completed three self-assessments concerning my communication skills in regard to the type of listener that I am, my verbal aggressiveness, and my communication anxiety levels. I asked my husband and a student that has been in three different classes that I teach at the high school level and is now my student aide to also complete the self-assessments for me. I was surprised to see that each of us evaluated my communication very similarly. My communication at work rated less aggressive and more confident than my communication at home but overall they were very close to the same. What surprised me the most was the listening style category that I fit into. I was rated a "people-oriented" listener (Rubin, Rubin, Graham, Perse & Seibold, 2009). The results suggest that I mainly focus on the feelings of the people that I communicate with and that although that may play a factor in strengthening relationships it may interfere with accurately judging a situation or a person’s motives (Rubin, Rubin, Graham, Perse & Seibold, 2009). I had never thought about how being focused on another person's emotions might stand in the way of seeing the whole picture clearly. Although I still think that it is very important to be an empathetic listener, I realize now that I need to make sure that I am clearly seeing the rest of the details as well.

This week I gained a few other insights about communication. First, I learned that perception and personal experiences or schemas play such a vital role in the way we communicate and interpret information around us. While completing the discussion assignment, I was surprised to learn that I could have an opinion about so many different things just by looking at a picture of someone. Perception can easily allow biased thoughts to stand in the way of accurate interpretations if we let it (O'Hair & Wiemann, 2012). Second, I learned about the self-fulfilling prophecy which states that our own predictions of how things will happen lead to behaviors that make those predictions come true (O'Hair & Wiemann, 2012). For example, "if your friend Josh goes to a party believing that others don't enjoy his company, he is more likely to stand in a corner, not talking to anyone and making no effort to be friendly. Thus, Josh's prophecy is fulfilled: others don't like him" (O'Hair & Wiemann, 2012, p. 51). The self-fulfilling prophecy helps me see how anxiety about a situation may lead to failure and how confidence in a situation may lead to more successful outcomes.


Reference:

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. New York: 

Bedford/St. Martin's.

Rubin, R. B., Rubin, A. M., Graham, E. E., Perse, E. M., & Seibold, D. R. (Eds.(2009). Communication research measures II: A sourcebook. New York: Routledge.

Making Adjustments to Communication

In order to effectively communicate in multiple settings, one must reflect on the various roles in which he or she identifies with (Vuckovic, 2008). For example, I take on many different roles throughout the day: a mother, a teacher, a wife, a director, and more depending on where I am and who I am communicating with. For each role that ensues, I make adjustments to the way that I communicate. "Communication success depends partially on being cognisant of the roles and identities one embodies at a given time and their influence on behavior" (Vuckovic, 2008, p. 56). When I am communicating with students I try to stay positive and friendly while remaining professional, unbiased and open-minded. I try not to reveal many of my personal views but help my students learn about facts and research in order to develop their own personal views. When I am communicating with friends and family I become much more opinionated and informal in my communication.

Similar adjustments must be made when I am communicating with people from different cultures. For example, when I am communicating with someone who does not speak English as their first language, I tend to repeat myself more, check for understanding more, and sometimes even speak louder. I notice myself doing these things without intentionally meaning to. Another example of communication adjustments is when I am interacting with young children. I tend to speak softer and at a higher pitch in more of a sing-song fashion. I also may be closer in proximity to the child and use more hand gestures.

In order to communicate more effectively with various groups of people it is important to keep an open-mind about other people's perspectives, not make assumptions about other people's beliefs or values, and be a good observer during communication. Try to read the nonverbal cues from the other person and make adjustments to communication as necessary.


Reference:

Vuckovic, A. (2008). Inter-cultural communication: A foundation of communicative action. Multicultural Education and Technology Journal, 2(1), 47–59.

An Experiment with Verbal Communication

This week, the blog assignment was to watch a television show that I was unfamiliar with, first without the sound and then with the sound. I was surprised to see how much I could understand without being able to hear anything. I was able to correctly identify emotions ranging from nervousness and frustration to disgust and grief. I was able to correctly identify the status and type of relationships the characters were involved in as well. Nonverbal communicators such as proximity, touch, body language, facial expressions, and physical actions helped send clear messages in terms of the emotions and feelings involved in each relationship. I found that in very important scenes during the show I could actually read lips to learn about what was happening.

Although I could still understand much about what was going on in the show, I found it a little boring to watch without the sound. I was missing out on the punch lines and the details that make life so interesting. Many of the important elements were lost in translation. Once I watched the same episode with the sound turned on, I was able to read into even more of the nonverbal signals than I was the first time. If I was watching a show that I was familiar with I probably would have been able to make even more accurate interpretations of what was happening the first time I watched.

Overall, I thought this assignment was fun and interesting. I learned how powerful nonverbal communication really is and how quickly one can adapt to life without sound. I also learned that I much prefer to hear people express themselves through words so that I don't have to guess at what they are trying to say.

A Model Communicator

Communication is a process that requires much practice and effort (O'Hair & Wiemann, 2012). It is a learned skill that some excel at and others continually fail at. Communication can have many purposes including acquiring wants and needs, becoming part of a group, or gaining control of a situation (O'Hair & Wiemann, 2012). One highly effective communicator that I would like to learn from and acknowledge is a co-worker who is a preschool teacher. She not only expresses love and compassion for children through her daily communication, she constantly opens doors to communication with co-workers, community members and families as well. She is an expert communicator. 

My co-worker maintains a positive attitude and a friendly approachable appearance in every situation. She is an expert at picking up on nonverbal cues from others and responding to those in a loving and accepting manner. Her constant practice with positive guidance techniques with children transfer over to her adult communication interactions as well. She is assertive in her needs and values but she asserts her views in ways that are morally and ethically acceptable. She is always well-intentioned and honest. She uses humor to break tension, and she thinks before she speaks in order to maintain intelligent conversations. The main force behind her communication is that she has a real passions for children that shines through. She genuinely cares about each child's well-being and works to collaborate with others to meet each child's needs. 

Sometimes I ask my co-worker how she would handle a situation because I respect her opinion and would model my own communication behaviors after hers. I think it is important to remember that we can always learn things from each other and that is why collaboration is so important. 

Reference:

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: An introduction. New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.

Hopes and Goals for the Early Childhood Field

Through this course I have learned that even the most well-intentioned person can accidentally make hurtful statements about others, exposing negative stereotypes deeply embedded in our society. I hope to continue in the future to self-reflect and maintain an open-minded and optimistic attitude about diversity and culture. I hope to create relationships of mutual respect and willingness to learn from each other with the children and families that I work with. One goal related to diversity and equity that I have for the early childhood field is for professionals in the field to become an active voice for children of all classes, races, ethnicities, and cultures.

I want to thank my colleagues that have supported my learning in this course through their awesome discussion posts and blog posts. Putting personal stories to the information helps solidify my knowledge of diversity, equity and social justice. Thank you all for your encouragement and enthusiasm for the early childhood field.

"Welcoming Families from Around the World"

This week's assignment requires me to imagine how I would prepare for a child enrolling in a child care center who's family just emigrated from another country. I am going to pretend that the child's family is emigrating from Mexico. I would take the following five steps in order to prepare for the child and his family. 

1) Research: First, I would look up some information and read about the traditional customs in Mexico. I would also talk to other families that I know that have emigrated to the United States from Mexico, asking what types of things might be helpful in caring for the child. 

2) Visual Representation: Next, I would search the library for books and other items to bring into the classroom that may help represent the child's language and country of origin. 

3) Meet: Next, I would meet with the child's family in order to learn more about the child's personal life and family culture. If the family did not speak English I would make sure to have a translator available. I would ask questions about the child's developmental needs and culture. 

4)Language: Next, I would practice pronouncing the names of the child and family in order to show respect for them. I would also learn how to say a few welcoming words to try to make them feel more comfortable in the classroom. I would also post a few welcoming words in their language.

5) Invitation: Next, I would invite the family to bring items into the classroom for show-and-tell or ask if they would like to speak to the class about living in Mexico. 

By taking these five steps, I hope to make the child and family feel respected and welcome in a new place. I hope to learn more about the child in order to help him be more successful in the classroom, promote his development, and meet his needs. By bringing in items and inviting the family to come into the classroom to share I hope to help the other children learn about another culture and learn to accept and honor differences in others. 

A personal experience with bias ...

The assignment this week was to think of a personal experience with bias, prejudice, or oppression. I feel luck that it took some deep reflection to remember a time when I felt looked down upon due to one of my social identities. The time I remember was in high school. I was living well below the poverty level with my immediate family- my mother, father and 7 siblings. I lived in a community fifteen miles from the closest part of town that consisted of mainly poor families, many of the houses did not have electricity or running water. I lived in a house that was only heated by a wood stove in the cold Alaskan climate; often during the winter months thick ice formed on the inside of the windows. I shared a bedroom with my two sisters. I felt lucky that I did not have to share the other bedroom with my five brothers! I rode the bus for an hour and a half to and from school each day, walking to the bus stop at 6:00 in the morning. I smelled of wood smoke and cigarettes from my father.

Classmates often commented in regard to where I lived. One comment that I remember in particular that hurt my feelings was, " You live... that's why your face looks like that." I felt like I was viewed as a lesser person because I lived in an undesirable part of town and did not have any money. It made me angry and embarrassed. I was angry at my parents and my peers. It made me jealous of others and embarrassed by my family. Their perception of me, affected my self-perception.

By experiencing judgement based on my class, I has to learn not to care about what other people thought about me. I learned not to let other people affect my goals, values, and self-esteem. I separated myself from the people that were rude to me and tried not to interact with them. I was too young to react in any other way besides anger and jealousy. If I could have calmly expressed myself, I am not sure if it would have changed their perspective or not. I never knew how to react. Today I have sympathy for anyone who experiences bias because I know how it feels. I think that if children were taught to have empathy from a young age many people might experience fewer micro aggressions.